musings, and not so a-musing

It is said, that god works in mysterious ways.

I remember driving home after I first went to work and praying......yes, me, praying; asking god to look after Jake. I pleaded with god to watch over him, not to let Jake get hurt, not to allow any of the horrible things I kept imagining happening from happening.

In a way, I'm here to tell you that prayer does work. Just not in the way that I actually imagined. I have to learn to be more specific in what I pray for. Jake is safe from all the nasty horrible things I prayed not to happen. Jake died because he got a little scratch from another cat in a fight.

I miss Jake. Not that I don't care for the new little master, but he's not Jake.

I'll tell you something creepy. While I was sitting here writing about Jake, Jack/Jake jumped up here on the desk to curl up and snooze. I swear, its like he knows and is trying very hard to be the sort of cat I used to have. He's so little and he tries so hard it seems. He does like Jake's litter box....deeper, more room to turn around and it has a cover. He's been playing in it. It means I can finally get all the litter he threw on the floor with the old box, cleaned up.

Oh, the creepy part.... When I turn out the light to go to bed. Just before I nod off, I feel something jump on the bed. It "feels" like when Jake used to jump up. I call his name...and I'll hear a purr....and my heart is content because Jake is on guard.

ya....God answers prayers in a sometimes seriously fucked up twisted and sadistic way.

But death isn't always the answer....yanno?